Tuesday, March 6, 2018

Reasons to work out that have nothing to do with women, sex, or losing weight


People try to motivate each other to work out with arguments like "you can lose some weight," or "if you get ripped you'll get laid." While these arguments are true they are based on extrinsic motives. That is, they are external to the individual. In contrast to extrinsic motives are intrinsic motives, or internal motives. These are the things you do because they make you feel good.

To be blunt, extrinsic motives can be demoralizing. I don't really care what a woman thinks about my body, and don't want to. I have no desire to get in shape in order to get laid. I could get laid now with a fat chick, and its all the same to me. I don't want the world's approval. I don't care if my body disgusts people. In fact, disgusting people makes me a feel a little like I have "owned" them. It's like, "Here asshole, watch my flab jiggle a little as I jump around." "Yeah that's right. Fuck you. I know you are revolted. I can do this all day and there is nothing you can do to stop me."

No. The reason I work out is because it feels good. I like the tired burn that puts me to sleep afterward. I sleep both better and less when I work out. I like how I feel stronger, and I like not feeling tired all the time. I also like having fewer headaches. Working out also helps my back, and makes me more flexible.

I don't do sit ups because I can't stand them. I don't do deadlifts because I don't like pain. My work out consists of a mixture of cardio machines, free weights, and interval training, with a walk afterwards. I don't care about losing weight, and I don't care if you like my fat ass.

And I've still lost 2 inches off my waist line and gained some definition.

Because there is no such thing as a workout without gains. Even if you don't lose weight you are still building some muscle. You will gain muscle tone and fit better into your pants. You will still look better and have more energy. Gyms are full of people who look critically at anyone who doesn't have a model quality body. Ignore them. Go during off-peak times or use an "old people's gym." If you are in Colorado this means one of the low cost Recreation Centers. If you are a woman consider using a women's gym. Don't ever go to Planet Fitness. They have an alarm that goes off when you work out too hard. If you are just starting a workout you want something in between the two extremes of "gym bro assholes" and "Planet Fitness don't-fat-shame-me-lazy-non-gyms." You want an old people's gym, or a family gym like the YMCA. If you really hate working out take a Zumba or dance class. Seriously. I once lost 40 pounds over one semester in f*cking Contemporary Dance.

If that doesn't make you laugh, back when I was a size 31' I even took a full year of ballet. FYI, I have amazing arches. Lol. Yes, I was once a male ballet dancer.





And I danced with about 30 chicks with no competition in the class from other men, and took some of them out on dates. I looked great and could lift a women off the ground while standing on the balls of my feet.



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